Thank you friends for your encouragement and support. Thanks particularly to you Joleen for telling me that my house isn't as bad as I "see" in my head. It helps that we have been to each others homes and see that we aren't pigs but "collectors" as you say.
BUT, I KNOW that I need to get a grip on some of this. You should WANT to be in your home and I don't. Today I took a big step. I told my husband about my conversations with Donna & Holly yesterday, told him that I want our home to be a nice home that we aren't embarrassed to have friends over to and and that it made me feel bad about myself. I told him that I need HELP! I was in tears by the end of our short conversation. ( little pitchers, don't you know?) Bless his heart, I forget how much I can lean on him when I need him. I get too busy hiding in my hole and forget he is on my side. He has been totally supportive and as of this writing at 11:50 we have 4 bags of donate and a huge bag of toss to go OUT THE DOOR TODAY! He said he will take anything I need to the Goodwill to make that step easier. Oh I love him so much. He didn't judge me, he just wanted to help me.
As far as the magazines, I haven't tackled them yet. I have all kinds, Somerset Pubs, CPS, decorating, etc. I was doing pretty well with them but they have crept up on me and piled up. I do like the idea of a give away but now Donna (again) and Martha have me doubting getting rid of them. ENABLERS!!!
Ok, back to the baby steps.. I can actually SEE my mantle and the brick I am thinking of painting so that has me excited again. I need to figure out whether certain furniture is keeper or toss and rethink how to arrange. I might need my Mom to come help with that or take pix for Holly.