05 June 2006

pure guilt

Hannah in garden This, is my most prized possession, my love, my heart...
So imagine how I felt today, after a week of her complaining about her "elbow" (shoulder) hurting, when I took her to see her pediatrician and he told me she had a broken clavicle! Oh! My heart broke right there on the spot. I feel so guilty waiting a week even though she had no swelling, bruises, etc.

For the record, we don't know HOW she did it but we suspect a fall off the teeter totter at daycare. She doesn't complain about it contstantly. The doctor said she is tough. We can't pick her up under her arms so we have to kind of hold her around her hiney. She can use her arm but she can't really lift in comfortably over her head. She is not wearing a sling (yeah riiight!) as the doctor said that toddlers are good at self splinting and won't do things that are too uncomfortable. It will take about 4-6 weeks for it to heal. We hope its smooth.


  1. OH HANNAH BABY!!! Gentle healing hugs from Aunt Lora!! Tell mommy not to be so hard on herself!! She's a GREAT Mommy, I know!!

  2. Heather, my son, (who is 15 today) broke his ulna (an arm bone when he was in grade 4. It broke when a friend fell on him in the back yard. He didn't complain much and so we thought it was okay-just a sprain. He fell on it twice more in the days following and we got a call from the school. We took him in and it turned out it was a buckle fracture-the bone snapped downward, which is why we couldn't tell it had broken. (Most bones go up, not down when they break.)

    Anyway, since then he has broken a wrist (Which had x-rays at the hospital and sent home saying no break, then recalled the next day to say whoops-there's a break, he needs a cast) and his nose (Punched in the face during a rugby game!) and most recently, one joint of his thumb.

    What I am driving at is four things: One, kids are going to break things-it's part of most kid's growing up. Two, if your child has a high pain tolerance like mine, it's unlikely you are going to always know it's happened, no matter how good a parent you are. Three, even professionals can miss broken bones. And four, kids will survive-mine's 15 and look at how many times he's broken something!

    Don't beat yourself up-Hannah will be fine. *hugs*

  3. You poor thing!! I feel your guilt, but this is a very normal occurance with little kids, and we've all had a similar happening! I always see her happy in photos, so rest assured that you are a famtastic mom!

  4. I am sending healing vibes from Illinois! I know you must have felt so awful....I hope Hannah is right as rain in no time!

  5. Poor baby!! Don't eat yourself up with guilt though. Most of the Moms I know would have assumed the same thing you did. And she's OK now. Here's to hoping for a quick recovery!!

  6. Big hugs to all of you. It's ok, she's tough and will be ok, we can't catch everything and they do heal. Buy some popsicles and sit under the arbor together, it will all be fine!

  7. Im sorry to hear your little one had a broken bone. You sound like a very good mom, so don;t beat yourself up over it....my little one just started walking so I am not lookign forward to teh trouble I am sure she will get herself into!

  8. Poor baby! Poor Mommy! Julian did the same thing when he was a toddler ... started crying when I was putting on his shoes, favored one foot over the other when he was walking, but no tears, no complaining. I thought maybe he had a splinter in his foot, but I couldn't find one. When we went to the doctor we found out he had a hairline fracture on his shinbone, and like you we had no idea when or how it happened. The doctor assured us that this was a common occurrence, but Ken and I were dying of guilt.

    It's not your fault. Don't beat up on yourself...you're a GREAT mom, I've seen you in action :-D Give Hannah hugs for me, and hugs for yourself too.

  9. I found this on a Google search for "toddler broken clavicle". I know just how you feel! I am feeling like the world's worst mother, but I think that's just our natural reaction when our kids get hurt. We are supposed to protect them from every possible little thing, regardless of how impossible that is.

    About a week ago, my 2 year old daughter took a tumble down the stairs. We got her calmed down, but when she moved, she would scream and cry that her "neck" hurt. So, off to the ER we went.

    Four hours, four x-rays, and countless tears (from both of us) later, I was told it was "musculo-skeletal pain", to dose her with Motrin, and give it a few days to a week for the tenderness to go away. They said if she was still acting like it bothered her after 5 days, to follow up with our family doctor.

    So, she's been doing better, and using the arm, but every now and then, she would start crying and saying that her neck hurt. So, I set up an appointment for today, and guess what? Yep... she's been walking around with a broken collar bone for about a week.

    She's accident prone, like her mama, and a daredevil like her older brother, so I'm petrified of what she'll do next!

    However, her older brother has her beat. He fell out of bed at age five and broke BOTH his radius and ulna clean across. He fell out of a car at age 6, and had to get stitches in his chin. Age 7 brought staples in the scalp, when he hit the corner of the nightstand. Age 8, stitches in the upper arm when he got ahold of a bungee cord, and it snapped back on him.

    We call them the Danger-Prone Duo. Ever see that plastics commercial, where the mom is saying, "If he makes it to (grade school, graduation, etc.), it will be a miracle"? Well, if I live to see both of them graduate, THAT will be a miracle!!

    I wonder if I can write off my hair-color as a child-related expense? I'm pretty sure they're going to have me completely gray by the end of the year.

    Stay strong!